Search me, O God, and know my heart!

"Lord, you have searched me and known me!
...even the darkness is not dark to you;
    the night is bright as the day,
    for darkness is as light with you...
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
    my soul knows it very well...
How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
    How vast is the sum of them!
...Search me, O God, and know my heart!
    Try me and know my thoughts!
24 And see if there be any grievous way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting!" Psalm 139:1,12,14,17,23,24

This is such an amazing psalm that David wrote down and that we have now. I will never stop being amazed with the relationship that David had with the LORD. This psalm was David's prayer to the LORD, it is written in such a personal and deep level that it is hard to skim over this psalm. This psalm catches my eye every time I read it, and pulls me deeper into the Word of God. 

The verses that never left my mind since the day I first layed eyes upon them are the 23-24 
"Search me, O God, and know my heart!
    Try me and know my thoughts!
24 And see if there be any grievous way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting"

Am I ready to call out to the LORD and ask Him to search my heart, for Him to try me, for Him to lead me in the everlasting way?!

I want to answer yes to all of those questions!
Yes LORD I'm ready for you to really search my heart,
Yes, I am ready for the trials that will show You and me how devoted I am to You!
Yes, LORD lead me in the way that You want for me!

But sadly this is not always true.

Sometimes I am ashamed to search my own heart, to remember all the thoughts I have thought, all the feelings and emotions that I let take control of me in some moments of my life. Sometimes as the day comes to an end, thinking back of what I've thought/said/did, I am embarrassed to call myself a follower of Christ. With this said, how I am every going to be ready for the LORD to lead me in the everlasting way?

Yes I am a sinner, and not perfect.

When I feel down and disappointed in my own self, this Psalm also raises my spirit up!
 David writes "...even the darkness is not dark to you;
    the night is bright as the day,
    for darkness is as light with you"

Praise the LORD for not leaving us alone when we continuously fall down and stumble on the obstacles that we often build ourselves!

I ask for forgiveness, and mercy from my Heavenly Father, and ask Him to help me to overcome my flesh, and show me His will! 

With Jesus by my side I do my best to work on my self, to watch what I'm saying, and to filter my thoughts.

Constantly being on guard is not easy, but with Jesus by my side it is a possible journey, that might inspire and encourage other people, with a priceless reward waiting at the end!

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